So this post has a backstory...and is kind of long...so stick with me!
During one of my classes this past summer quarter I was discussing my obsession with grades with a fellow classmate (a PhD student). She told me not to worry about grades and not to let it have such an effect on me. I responded that it did have an effect on me because it was judgement of my quality as a student. She sort of half laughed and said "I was just like you until this exact point in my Master's program". I looked at her in, I guess, an odd manner and she proceeded to tell me about her adviser. She had always worried about grades and other matters and really let them bother her. One day her adviser say her down and told her to imagine that life was like a lake and she was a rock thrown in to the middle of that lake. The ripples that are created represent each event that happens in life. "Look at those ripples" he told her. "Do any of them push the rock? Do any of them affect the rock? No, the ripples radiate out from the rock, but none of the ripples can change where the rock stands in the lake and what the rock is" She told me to think about this. No life event can rock who I am at the core or what I stand for. Interesting...
Last night I got a call that my parents are coming to visit next weekend for Labor Day. My mom has a remote office based in Denver and has to come up to do some training and stuff so my dad bought a ticket and they are going to stay the long weekend with me. I am SO excited. Yes, I saw them in Texas last weekend, but they haven't seen my new house, met my friends, seen the horse or dog, or really seen Denver so I am really excited that they are coming. Mom mentioned that they would get a hotel and I said No they could stay in my bed and I would stay on the couch! I have two evaporative coolers in my house (one doesn't evaporate...so is really just a high powered fan) and the Colorado nights are cool so it would be fine! I was back inside from talking to Mom no longer than 15 minutes and the fan motor on my cooler went out. I was SO upset. This cooler is a replacement the company sent when they evaporation mechanism on the first cooler went out! I have had it exactly a month...ONE MONTH! I went online to get the number and, you guessed it, they are only open Monday-Friday 5am-6pm PACIFIC time. So, I am without a cooler for the weekend. I can handle that, but I want my parents to stay with me and therefore I need a replacement ASAP.
I was extremely upset and moping around. I wanted to EAT! Luckily, I forcasted that this would eventually happen and I have nothing "snacky" in my house, the joys of living alone...This did not stop me from wondering around the kitchen and staring at the fridge and pantry. You see, I have this box of Thin Mints that my boyfriend bought when he was visiting in March (yay Girl Scout Cookies). Well, he forgot to take them home so I froze them for him as a sort of surprise for the next time he visits. I HATE Thin Mint Cookies (Yes, Crucify me now), but last night I was about ready to rip in to that box of disgusting minty cookies and eat myself in to a better mood. Instead, I put on my PJs and laid down on the couch to watch reruns of Greys Anatomy. I said f*** my nightly routine, I want to go to bed. Not 10 minutes later I found myself pacing the kitchen again. Finally, I remembered my friends story (see you knew it would come full circle eventually...). I thought, okay so my cooler broke for the second time in 3 months, am I really letting this throw me so out of whack?
So, I bucked up, I grabbed some green bell peppers for a snack, I washed my face, I exfoliated, I moisturized, I brushed my teeth, I put my mouth guard in, and I took my contacts out. Laying in bed last night I felt so good about myself! I slept great knowing that I did not let my routine suffer and I did not trash my diet for some cookies that I would not enjoy and did not need.
The morale of the story folks, is to always remember that your ripples go out, not in!