Womanhood

SO I started my monthly journey into the world of womanhood today...and it sucks.

I am moody, bitchy, tired, and I gained a half pound (although not bad seeing as though I was REALLY bad on Wednesday). On top of this I have to work tomorrow, my landlord is a crazy senile old broad who needs to get a boyfriend or get a job, and one of my coworkers needs to realize that the UNIVERSITY of Denver is not the MILITARY of Denver and does not operate as such...

Alright if I keep typing this may end bad for someone... Catch ya later...

WHY???!!!???

Ugh...SO I am on this plateau breaker and I was doing so well. I had my lunch packed and meals planned. I made a delicious ceviche and had it for lunch. When I got to work there was a staff appreciation event. I managed to get through the first 2 hours without eating anything. Then, I had to walk upstairs to speak with a few people and my bosses boss was pushing me to grab food. My plan was to take the food respectfully and then throw it out or pass it off to one of my other coworkers...what did I do? I ate it. It was mostly veggies and only a few starches but STILL...WHY!!!! Ugh I am so pissed at myself.

I was down this morning and on a role to get down further in the next 10 days...well that is probably shot right about now. I am so mad at myself and don't even know what to think. I was going to be religiously good for 10 days so that I could reach my goal and feel accomplished...GRRRR! Well, I will be drinking extra water and using extra lemon and hopefully flushing out this crap that is now in my body.

Here and There

So today was a good weigh-in day! I weighed in at 136, which is 1.25 pounds down from Monday and .75 pounds down from Saturday! YAY!

In other news, school is busy, work is busy, fellowship is busy...Getting the picture?

Update

So, I haven't blogged in a while. I wish I had an excuse, but I don't. My only excuse is that I stare at the blank screen and don't know what to type. I had a mini melt down today when I gained 1/2 pound over the weekend after following the plan as closely as I can. I have never been terribly anal about measuring my Fat Free Salad dressings or my Splenda or my Morton's Lite Salt so that could be the problem. I laid in bed this morning and almost didn't go in to the center to weigh-in because I was embarrassed. I finally snapped myself out of it and decided that I needed to buck up and deal with it. Paying for this program is counter productive if I only go in for counseling when things are going well. So I went in (cue the melt down...maybe meltdown is the wrong word to use here...maybe not...you decide). So I went in with the intention of saying screw it I am happy where I am and I want to move to the next phase. I mean I already hit my goal weight so this is all wiggle room anyways. Luckily I got one of my favorite counselors today and she talked me off the ledge. I paid for the weeks and I only have two left. She convinced me that the last 7 pounds was TOTALLY loosable in the next 2 weeks and gave me a plateau breaker to use to help the process along. This made me feel better and put me in a much more positive mood.

Well in all my complaining I forgot to tell you...I HIT 30 POUNDS! Yes, I am 30 pounds lighter than I was May 25, 2011. I am 63.75 pounds lighter than I was January 1, 2006 (my heaviest weight ever). That is more than my dog and cat combined. I know that this in its self is a wonderful accomplishment, but Nancy (my counselor this morning) was right. I will be so proud and so happy when I can say I hit my second goal weight and I stuck to it! So...here we go...12 days...

Chugging Along

So today started off well! I spent some quality time with Trinity and Remy this morning as the sun rose; however, it was COLD! Then I weighed in at 137.5!! WOOHOO I am only .25 pounds away from my 30 pound milestone and only 7.5 pounds away from my final goal. Looking in the mirror this morning was the first time I saw my body and said "wow, I DO look good". I knew I was loosing weight and looked good, but today I finally noticed it for myself (we are always the last to compliment ourselves).

While this was all so very exciting, the rest of my goals aren't going so well. I have not been going to my workout classes. I did not enjoy Zumba and the Ab Blast is hard to get to since it starts 5 minutes after I get off work. The yoga class is awesome and I really enjoy it; however, Wednesdays are my late night so to get to campus 2 hours earlier just makes it a really long day. I know I am making excuses, which I swore I wouldn't do, but I am still loosing the weight. I think I may alter my workout goal to include 30 minutes on the Wii twice or three times a week. I think that this works better for me than the actual classes, though I love the classes...ugh the agony!

Until this week I was doing well on washing my face and wearing my mouth guard; however, for some reason that hasn't happened this week. I am still applying my makeup every morning though! Small steps. I stopped taking out my contacts every night because I was having more eye problems doing that then when I don't. So, I have changed to taking them out on Saturday and leaving them out until Monday. That way my eyes have time to breathe but I don't have to worry about the in and out pains throughout the week.

I have really been doing a lot of nutrition research and stuff to prepare me for life sans Slimgenics (though I still have their support for 18 more weeks). I will be off the weight loss plan in two weeks and started on the Balance phase. I don't really know what that means but I have heard rumor of cheese and free choice on veggies and fruits...can we say bananas, onions, and CHEESE! Within reason of course.

I have been scraping the bottom of my fridge lately waiting for today (Wednesday) because it is double coupon day at Sprouts. I am heading there after work today to pick up some protein, fruits, and veggies. Luckily, I have AWESOME neighbors that are taking care of the animals on Wednesdays for me since it is such a long day for me. It allows me to make my day a little longer (adding a grocery store run after class) and not worry about the kids at home! I don't know what I would do without my awesome neighbors. I really think I would be loosing it...

So, in other news, the job search feelers are beginning to go out, though there are no jobs posted yet for June starts. They probably will not be posted until Novemberish, but I want to be prepared when they do go up. Sweet Briar actually has a job posted that has been up for a while. I am considering applying for it as a back-up back-up plan. I love the school and LOVE the Co-Curricular (Student) Life Office; however, I don't love the town...so it would REALLY be a back-up. I think I may go talk to the head of the department when I am in town in October and just put my feelers in to the position. I would rather be in Dallas, but if nothing pans out there it is at least a school whose mission, vision, and goals I believe in!

GOAL 1 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, today I officially hit my first goal of 140 pounds! I am so excited! As most of you know, I lowered my goal to 130 several weeks ago to give me some wiggle room and peace of mind. I am so happy and so empowered!

8.75 pounds to go...
19 days to go...

HOORAY!

To begin, I am sorry for not writing the last few days. I was put on "Detox Days" as a plateau breaker to help shove me under the 140 mark. This was the two most MISERABLE food days that I have ever had in my entire life. Here's the deal:

Breakfast: 1 whole grapefruit, 1 Supergenic snack (aka a pudding or drink bought from Slimgenics)

Snack: 2 cups of cucumbers soaked over night in raw apple cider vinegar

Lunch: 2 cups of lettuce, 6 oz. chicken, 1/4 cup fresh raw parsley

Snack: 1 Supergenic snack

Dinner: 2 cups of lettuce, 6oz. fish, 1/4 cup fresh raw parsley

Now, If you have never eaten large quantities of fresh raw parsley, DO NOT DO IT! It is possibly one of the worst tasting, most potent, awful things you will EVER put in your mouth. And NO, I am not being a drama queen. 

Well, after suffering the torturous eating habits for two days I am FINALLY below 140! I FINALLY have hit the elusive 130s!!! I could not be happier. This gives me all the more reason to stick to plan and enjoy the last three weeks of weight loss!

So, I have been trying to mentally prepare myself for the "Balance" phase in which I get to add back all the foods I have been missing. I have also been preparing myself for my new free lifestyle of maintenance and forever. My new favorite helper in this is Hungry Girl! I bought one of the first Hungry Girl books years ago (200 recipes under 200 calories). I loved everything I made out of that book. Well over the years I have forgotten it until she popped up on my radar again recently. There are amazing tips, tricks, and recipes that she provides on the site. She also has two new cookbooks out that I want called 300 recipes under 300 and Supermarket Survival Guide.

Anyways, I have 3 weeks left to get there...

Same Ole Same Ole

SO, I went to weigh in this morning. I finally bit the bullet and decided that I needed to weigh in and get it over with. Good news is that I was the exact same as I was on Friday! Bad news is that I was the exact same as I was on Friday! Another whole week wasted...

Well the center decided to put me on a plateau breaker for Thursday and Friday just to give my system a little "umph". The problem? Thursday I am leading a training at a Frozen Yogurt shop for my new interns (I tried to schedule it for the on campus conference room or coffee shop but my supervisor REALLY wanted to go off campus...I am trying to find another cute spot since it will be cold I may be able to talk him into an off campus coffee shop). Friday we are having ANOTHER party at my community to eat all of the food that we had left over from the last party...ugh. I don't know how I am going to get out of this one. Since I will be on the plateau breaker there are no substitutes so I HAVE to stick to the plan. Especially since I have 24 days to loose 11 pounds (HA HA).

You see, here is my predicament. My original goal is only 1 pound away. I wanted to lower it since I had all of these extra weeks. Well, since then I have yet to get to my ORIGINAL goal. This is frustrating (to say the least). I at least want to loose 6 pounds in the next 24 days so that I can have that 5 pound cushion under my goal to moderate and NEVER be above my original goal ever again. I know people say you can still loose after the weight loss phase while they are "balancing" your new diet, but I would like to be at my goal before that so maybe I can loose a bit more? I go back on Friday to discuss how my first day of the plateau breaker went and then I will go back Monday. Hopefully this metabolic kick in the ass will help me get past Thursday and Friday and have an awesome last 20 days. Heres to hoping...

BY THE WAY:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY DEAREST!

I Love You More Than The Most

A TRUE test

So, today was my first day of class for the FINAL year of school (for a long time at least). After 18 years of school I only have 1 more to go. The next 4 weeks will be a true test of strength for my new positive outlook on life. You see, I am taking a required course called Research Methods and Statistics: Educational Research Methods (redundant....uh yes, but that is a different rant all together). The course is being split taught between a professor (the last 5 weeks) and a PhD candidate (the first 5 weeks). The PhD candidate is the worst speaker and teacher I have ever seen. After 4 hours in his class I was so tired, bored, and depressed. He simply read us the whole syllabus and then read us 35 power point slides...I couldn't do that myself from the comfort of my own couch?

So, for the next 4 weeks I will truly be tested to see if I can keep a positive outlook on life and this situation!

In weight loss news, I still have not weighed in. I will go to the center in the morning and pray that I am at least the same if not down from where I was almost a week ago. I wish I could focus! BUT that is my goal. 3 weeks of perfect eating and focused goal achieving...

...crap!

I had a bad weekend of going off track. When it is just me in my normal routine I do GREAT! My biggest problem is that I live in a little community of 7 apartment on a small horse farm in Aurora and we are all really close friends. Saturday we unloaded about 200 bales of Hay and then one of the guys went to Del Taco and got us all burritos. I tried really hard to wiggle my way out of it saying I had food marinating and in the crock pot, I was on the diet and didn't want to go off, and so many other excuses. When he showed up with the burritos though I gave in and had it...I was so mad at myself. Then Sunday was the owner of the property's birthday party and I tried to just have small things and did good, but then I went back again and again knowing it was wrong! I have NO will power when it comes to this type of stuff (thus being almost 40 pounds over weight...). I don't understand. I am so strong in other areas; however, when it comes to food something takes over and I can't control myself!

I was so embarassed by my weight gain from the weekend I didn't go in to the center today. I wanted to give myself a couple days to get back on track. I HATE when I screw up like this...I wish I had an excuse other than my lack of will power when it comes to food...

New Favorite...

Okay, so I have a new all time favorite grocery store!

I was talking to my counselor at SG yesterday about the fact that I was getting into a rut with my food. Since I am so close to goal I am only allowed to eat Supergenic thermosnacks. While these are delicious, there is a limited number of them. So, I have had to get creative, but lately, that creativity is floundering... Anyways, she mentioned that I go to Sprouts Farmers Market. This isn't a normal farmers market where local farmers set up a booth (it is more like a grocery store that sells local, healthy, and organic stuff). I was really nervous going in because I just KNEW that this place was going to be super expensive (like Central Market and Whole Foods). Guess what? SO CHEAP!

I found a lot of 50 calorie bread options (a cinnamon raisin bread and a honey whole wheat is what I purchased). Some amazing 100 calorie flatbreads, and some huge 100 calorie burrito tortillas. There is also a ginormous selection of calorie free/fat free salad dressing (I bought a bacon ranch, honey mustard, Asian, and sesame ginger). PLUS I found a calorie free caramel dip and marshmallow fluff. I bought them both (I don't know if it is on plan but it seemed legit and only had 50mg sodium and nothing else...way less than the salad dressings I am allowed to have...). I used the caramel last night with my apples and it is so potent. I think I barely used a teaspoon of this stuff for a whole apple. It is great! You get the amazing taste of caramel without the sugar and fat! I am going to use the marshmallow fluff tonight with my Banana Creme ice cream that I am making to add another layer of flavor and texture. I will ask Monday when I weigh-in if this stuff is allowed, but I don't see why not... This place also had a great selection of salt free spice mixtures so I picked up 3 different spice mixtures, some minced onions, onion powder, and vanilla extract. I also found a no sodium Vegetable bouillon that I am going to use to crockpot some chicken.

Anyways, they also have an amazing meat section. I couldn't use the area to its full potential right now, but I am dreaming of using it when I finish the weight loss phase. There was Venison, Elk, Wild Boar, Bison, Chicken, Turkey, Pork, and any fish you could dream of! I bought some beautiful sashimi grade Ahi tuna for dinner tonight, some ground bison for burgers and chili, and a huge 3lb thing of boneless skinless chicken breast, and two dozen eggs.

The produce section is also to die for. There was produce I had never heard of! I was talking to Shane while I was shopping and had him googling stuff! I ended up buying some Watermelon, Pineapple, Peaches, and limes for fruit (I had some great strawberries and blueberries and apples at home still). Then for veggies I bought an herb salad mixture (lettuce, dill, cilantro, other stuff I can't remember), cucumbers, tomatoes, sweet potatoes, Green Onions, eggplant (I'm gonna try to like it!), and mushrooms.

I got all of this...and some stuff I am probably forgetting, for $130! That seems ridiculously cheap to me, especially considering the salad dressings and seasonings and processed breads I bought since those are usually pretty pricey! I don't know if I am way out in left field here, but the prices seemed awesome to me!

GOOD NEWS TEXAS FOLK: There is a Sprouts in Austin (several locations including in Round Rock), Carrollton, Cedar Hills, Coppell, Dallas (Forest and Marsh Ln?), Flower Mound, Fort Worth (1-20 and Hulen), Frisco, Plano, Richardson, and Southlake.

Back on Track

So I weighed in this morning still a little high, but I WAS down 3.5 pounds from Monday. I am slowly shedding the water weight and extra poundage gained from the fun filled weekend with my parental units. The counselors are so positive and such a great help. We discussed recipes, variety in diet, and ways to help make the whole process more enjoyable and not so stale. I only have 29 days of weight loss left before I begin learning how to eat like a real person again! PHEW!

Last night's Zumba class left a lot to be desired...I thought that it would be more interactive and fun. Instead it was an "instructor" dancing up front and 35 of us trying to figure out what she was doing. I believe that SHE got a wonderful workout...the other 35 of us...not so much. I thought that the class would have a more instructive component to help us get the most of the dance moves and workout. I am going to give the class another couple chances before I completely give up on it.

I have begun all of my pre-Italy and fall quarter planning and it is going to be a BUSY quarter/semester! Shane was slated to come see me in October for my birthday, but he is starting a new job and will be in training and unable to get the time off. So, instead, he is buying me a plane ticket to come see him and his parent's are going to pay to board Remy as my birthday present! I was really excited for him to meet all my new friends/neighbors, but whatcha gonna do...we will have fun in Virginia (and I'll get to wear my new dress Mom bought me last time I was home ;-)  ). Then, also for my birthday, Mom is flying me home to do some Italy prep work and to spend some time with the family. THEN, we will be going to Italy! Then, Shane's family is going to fly me out for Shane's graduation from Police Academy. Then, I will be going home for Family Christmas/Christmas! Like I said...busy...

A Yoga Morning

I feel so great today! I woke up at 5am to take care of the animals and make my food for the day. Then I hit the 7am Power Yoga class at the DU gym. I feel so great! I love waking up to a good stretch and workout. I'm glad that I feel energized today since I will be busy busy busy at work. Today started with a lot of e-mail answering. I will then be heading to a course on how to edit our website. Then I have a meeting about a training I am conducting for the interns that I will be supervising. THEN I will be heading to work where we will be running crazy making sure everything is set up for Orientation events. Finally, I will be making an appearance at the Transfer Student Picnic at "Wash Park". Phew...

Tomorrow is my first day of ZUMBA!

My next weigh-in is not until Friday morning...keep your fingers crossed!

The Results are in...

+4.25 pounds...

Yes, this means I did NOT earn the extra two weeks and I have 14.5 pounds to loose in just 4.5 short weeks...

On the other hand, I know that most of this is water weight and I will be able to flush most of it within the week. I was supposed to start another plateau breaker this week, but since I went so far off plan over the weekend they want me to stabilize my eating for a week before adding any other kind of deviations. I am finishing a "Flush and Omit" today, which means that for the past two days I have eaten no starch and only one serving of fruit. In addition I have been drinking extra water with fresh lemon and adding raw, unfiltered, Apple Cider Vinegar to my daily routine. I will weigh in again on Friday and hope to be back down the 4.25 pounds if not a little more. I hate that I did not earn the two weeks and that I will now have wasted a full week to correct for one weekend, but I had a blast and I enjoyed myself.

I honestly can not wait until I get in to the maintenance section and have learned how to have weekends like I just had, correct my weight, and move on. Like I said before, it might be a good thing that I didn't earn the two free weeks. If I had I would have JUST finished balance when I left for Italy. This way I am able to have two solid weeks of maintenance before Italy. See, I can find the silver lining...I CAN!

Horribly Awesome Weekend

Well, I can kiss those two free weeks goodbye. Mom and Dada were here and it was amazing. We laughed, joked, and generally had an amazing weekend. It all started Friday with a great dinner at BJs. Saturday, mom and I went shopping and spent some one on one time together. The night there was a BBQ in my community and it was so good! The theme was Mexican and everyone brought covered dishes. I tried to moderate, but I am not used to eating cheese and grease and sweets. I didnt think that I ate too much, but all of a sudden I was SICK! I had eaten myself sick...I am so embarrassed!!!! Sunday, we went to Taste of Denver, which is like the state fair. It was awesome! I did pretty good there. Then we went to dinner and I tried to make the best choices that I could. Even so, I KNOW that Saturday and Sunday killed me and I will weigh-in WAY up tomorrow...I could kick myself. I am going to workout tonight and hopefully that will lead to being even? Doubtful...

Today is a new day! I began the Omit and Flush process, which helps to clean out my system and get my metabolism back on track. I have five weeks left and HAD 10.25 pounds to loose...this may change tomorrow...

For now, I am at work...Orientation week at DU started today...

Special Guest: Jeff Arnold

So this post has good news, better news, and best news! Imagine that? So, the good news is: I was contacted yesterday by a Slimgenics representative that follows my blog about featuring one of the Slimgenics success stories, so today you will be seeing a short video that Jeff put together about his journey through weight loss. The Better news is that I lost another 1.25 pounds today! Meaning I only have 10.25 to go! The BEST news is, that Jeff has not only allowed me to show his video, but he has also agreed to be a guest blogger and share a little more about how loosing weight has changed his entire life (not just his physical appearance).

So, without further ado...

Hi Lauren! Thank you for the opportunity to be a guest on your blog, and talk about my new life with your blog readers. Like what you are currently doing, I also lost weight through the SlimGenics program. In fact, quite a bit of it… 110 pounds. I reached my goal 15 months ago, and I have maintained my new weight ever since.

    You know, it’s funny, but I don’t even really think about having lost the weight anymore. That may sound odd, but what I have found is that although that was a huge part of giving myself a new life, it was only the beginning. I learned so much through their program, that I enjoy all aspects of my life in a whole new way. I mean, when you are in an overweight body, it is difficult to comprehend how “the other half” lives. But, I am part of that other half now, and it is amazing.

    Oh, let me count the ways… I am a fitness junkie these days. I enjoy healthy foods, and REFUSE to ever put fast food or other garbage like that in this new body. I have energy to play with my two sons. It put a spark back in my marriage (my wife actually did the program too and lost 45 pounds.) I am confident. I mean truly confident. If I could do this, I can do anything, and I really believe that now. I couldn’t tell you a single thing about what’s happening on television, but I can tell you lots about the scenery as I’m running on the Big Dry Creek Trail, and what it’s like to come up the hill at Standley Lake. It’s amazing. I take pride in how I dress now. I look people in the eye when I talk to them, and don’t feel a need to withdraw. I feel young. I feel like a teenager, and I don’t even think I felt like that when I was one. I have never been this healthy. I could go on forever, but the bottom line is that I have an amazing life now, and I am so thankful that I was able to make these changes. I am thankful for my experience with SlimGenics, and as you have mentioned – I am thankful for the opportunity to inspire others with my experience. I have had many people start to turn their lives around, and they have thanked me for the inspiration. Man, I would have never seen that one coming… Not in a million years.  

    As far as I’m concerned, health and wellness are so critical in our lives, and I encourage you and any of your blog readers to embrace it and drink it all in. It really is awesome!

Powering Through

Okay...so not weighing myself EVERY morning (and lets be serious, every chance I get) is giving me all kinds of anxiety. I am going for an official weigh-in tomorrow and I don't like not knowing what I am getting myself in to... I think that I have been good (except for a Grande Skinny Vanilla Latte yesterday...I am not supposed to have milk but I was craving one so bad that I figured it would be fine. I forgot to only order a tall until she handed it to me, so I was only going to drink half...lets guess how that worked out?). Anyways, I have been using a lot of lemon in my water, eating grapefruit, varying my different proteins, etc., so I should have good news to report tomorrow...pray I have good news!

In other news, I got my new air conditioner yesterday! I finally caved and sent back the TWO broken evaporative coolers (swamp coolers) for a full refund. The company was so irritating and I finally decided that I had gone through enough pain. I forked out a few extra dollars and got a real air conditioner. I was pretty crafty/handy (read cheap) in constructing a tall table to sit the compressor on. All of the reviews said it should be positioned above head height for maximum cooling. So, I turned Remy's old kennel on its end, placed plywood on the top, covered it in a neutral sheet, and VOILA! a stand for my A/C!

So, I turned it on last night and let me tell you, I have not been so cool/comfortable in my own apartment...ever! In college our dorms were always hot, in my first apartment it was too expensive to run the air (it would TRIPLE my electric bill), and then I bought those crappy swamp coolers. Now, paradise! I can keep my windows closed, thereby reducing the amount of dust/sand wafting into my apartment from the nearby horse arena AND I can stay cool and not humid!

It is the small victories...